Encouraging Children's Faithfulness: Start Early

Encouraging Children's Faithfulness: Start Early

We parents stress over how to interest our children in spiritual things. Listed among "spiritual things" I include attending Bible class, worship, youth events, spiritual discussions at home, Bible Camp, prayer, Bible reading, and when they get older, helping at church events, such as VBS.

There is so much in the world to attract our children's attention away from spiritual things. Not all of these attractions are bad, such as sports or hanging out with (good) friends. But, they can be a distraction if they pull them away from family- or spiritually-based activities.

It is disheartening to see teenagers lose any and all interest in church and family functions. When I say "church" I don't just mean "attendance," but the whole experience of worship, youth programs, fellowship meals, visiting with older members, and a host of other spiritual and relational activities with other believers. How can we encourage children's faith and faithfulness during these tough, teenage years?

One thing is to start early. Start early taking kids to classes and worship. Start early letting them see you take meals to shut-ins, visiting in the hospital, mowing the grass for an invalid neighbor, and helping anyone who needs it. Let them know that is a natural extension of your love for God and people.

When Wes was five he heard an annoucement at church about someone being sick. He told his mother, "I think we need to bake some brownies and take it to them." Where did he learn that? From observing his Mom doing it for others.

Worship, service, Bible classes, Bible camp, Bible reading and prayer, you name it, start them early and allow these spiritual disciplines and functions to settle deelply into the hearts of our children. I sometimes have a child read a scripture or even give a lesson to the church when they are only 6 or 7 years old. Why so young? Because they are excited at that age, not scared.

Below is a video of two boys whose parents have the right idea about starting early. Can you imagine what kind of song leaders these boys will be when they are older? Ask many adults to lead a song or read scripture at church and notice how many decline! It's hard to start that as adults. These boys are being started before they know they are supposed to be nervous! Enjoy the show!



What are some things you have done or are doing in your home to develop an early faith-base in your children? If your kids are older, what can you suggest to young families to help them?

Note: I am hoping to reach some young families with this. I'll have a couple of more posts about encouraging faith and faithfulness in children. If you have any young families you can refer to this discussion, thank you.

Warren

COLORADO ROCKIES

Colorado Rockies

I remember walking through the local baseall park when Wes was about 8 years old and thinking, "I love ballparks." It was opening day for the local little league program in Cody, Wyoming. There were ballgames all day. Families might be there for 2 or 3 games. League officials cooked hamburgers and served a free meal for all the families. I grilled those burgers for a couple of years. It was great.

Ulysses, KS, has the same enthusiasm for the ballpark and the ball games. Moms and Dads cheer as their little boy or girl hits a ball off a tee and runs to third, then the pitchers mound, then home, all-the-while a coach is chasing after him or her saying "Over here, first is this way!" A few fields away Moms and Dads are cheering as their fifteen-year old is trying to prove he has the stuff to replace Cal Ripken. He just might. Even Cal started out playing baseball in a local little league park.

This past Father's Day Weekend I got to experience baseball at the Cal Ripken level in Denver, Colorado. Five of us from five different states met in Denver for a couple of Rockies' games and family fun. Pictured below are my dad, me, my brother Bob (1st row) and my son Wes and nephew Tyler.
































We came from five different states to enjoy two Rockies games and each other's company. Yes, we were there on Saturday night, June 20, when Todd Helton hit his game-winning two-run homer!



This is a beautiful park, with the beautiful Rocky Mountains seen in the background.






The Rockies organization is trying hard to make this a family-friendly atmosphere. They provided a wheel chair and "driver" to take my Dad to his seat and then to the front gate after each game.

When a fan was bad-mouthing a player from another team to me, using unsavory vocabulary, a Rockies' usher approached him and asked him not to use that language in the ballpark and to talk about another player that way. The fan explained why he was so upset with the other athlete and the usher said, "I understand. Just be careful what you say."

It had been several years since I had been to a professional baseball game. In recent years I have been to the College world series of baseball and softball, but not a pro game. I've decided not to wait so long again. When I told Cheryl I wanted us to attend another game this year she said, "Let's go."

We never get too old for "Take me out to the ballgame," either the song or the actual experience. If it's been awhile, take your kids to a ballgame. Or your Dad. It's worth it. The five of us traveled from Utah, Montana, Kansas and Tennessee (Wes is moving to Wyoming, so I'm counting that as the 5th state) to meet in Denver and we'll probably do it again next year.

Here is one more view of the stadium. Can't wait until I go back!















Warren Baldwin

Note: Wes has some pictures of the other game we attended which he'll be posting on his blog, Sports Inspiration.

A GOOD WIFE

A GOOD WIFE

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22

If you have a wife who loves you, seeks your best interests and cares for you, you know the truth of this proverb. It doesn’t have to be explained. Your life is deeply enriched because of the presence of this woman who loves you, your wife. "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord."

As a kid, I remember listening to the words of a Charley Pride song that my dad played a lot in our house:

"Whenever I chance to meet, some old friends on the street, They wonder how does a man get to be this way. I’ve always got a smiling face, at anytime and anyplace, And every time they ask me why I just smile and say:

Well, people may try to guess, the secret of our happiness, But some of them never learn that it’s a simple thing. The secret that I’m speaking of, is a woman and a man in love, And the answer is in this song that I always sing.

(Chorus)

You’ve got to kiss an angel good morning, And let her know you think about her when you’re gone. Kiss an angel good morning, And love her like the devil when you get back home."

That song, "Kiss an Angel Good Morning," could be Charley’s commentary on this verse from Proverbs, "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord."

The Bible proclaims marriage to be a blessing. Sure, there are stories of husbands and wives who don’t function as they should and, their home lives are not always satisfying. Think of David. But that is not how God wants it.

God plans for marriage to be fulfilling, satisfying, and uplifting. "The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’" (Gen. 2:18). He did. He made Eve, a wife for Adam. So long as they focused on each other and met the needs of their partner, things went smoothly for Adam and Eve. It was only after they selfishly ate of the forbidden fruit that their attention began to focus on themselves and their needs. When that happened, well, we know what happens when husbands and wives are selfish. Things don’t go the way they should.

A husband who can say, "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord" is a husband who thinks about his wife, loves her, and knows the blessing she is to his life. He appreciates her. He knows, as Solomon wrote in yet another proverb, that a good wife "is from the Lord" (Prov. 19:14).

To all of you men who have been blessed by God with a good wife, appreciate her. Let her know it. Let her be the angel you greet with joy first thing in the morning and the last thing at night. If she brings gladness into your life, reflect some of that gladness back to her. Let her know that in her you have found something good.

(From "Roaring Lions, Cracking Rocks and Other Gems from Proverbs." I have finished this book of devotionals on Proverbs and will be sending to the publisher hopefully next week. It has been through 3 edits, and Cheryl is reading it this weekend. I’ll tell you more about it in a couple of weeks. In the meantime, thanks for reading! WB)

With this little tribute to wives, let me add a "thank you" to my wife Cheryl. She is allowing me to attend a "Grandfather-Fathers-Grandsons" day (actually 2 days) in Denver. My Dad, my son Wes, my brother Bob and his son Tyler will be taking in a couple of Colorado Rockies games. Also, my daughter Kristin is in Denver at a basketball tournament, so we’ll catch a couple of her games as well. I’ll be visiting blogs and posting again in a couple of days.

Warren Baldwin

Honesty and a Kiss

HONESTY AND A KISS

"An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips." Proverbs 24:26

I want to argue with that proverb. "Solomon, I do appreciate honesty, and I know God demands honesty from people. I know that honesty is crucial in all relationships, especially in marriage. But an expression of intimacy like a kiss, between a loving husband and wife, is in a category all its own."

In fairness to Solomon and his social and cultural era, a kiss had a larger function than just expressing affection between a husband and wife. A kiss was a means of offering a greeting or of expressing friendship, reconciliation, and loyalty between all family members, friends, and even of citizens to a ruler (Bruce Waltke, The Book of Proverbs: New International Commentary on the Old Testament [Grand Rapids: Eerdmans Publishing Co., 2005], 2:292–93). In some ways a kiss was comparable to our practice of shaking hands, a means of greeting and expressing friendship. I like our custom of reserving the kiss to the more intimate relationships, like between husband and wife.

However, the real issue in this proverb is not the kiss but the honesty of one’s conversation. "An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips." Assuming the kiss on the lips to be a sweet experience, Solomon says that for a person of integrity and character, honesty is that sweet. Listen to another passage from Solomon about honesty:

"Listen, for I have worthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse. To the discerning all of them are right; they are faultless to those who have knowledge." (Prov. 8:6–9)

Wisdom personified is speaking here. Wisdom declares that the honest person can speak words that are not crooked or perverse because he has no insincere or selfish motives. Honest words come from a pure heart. Wisdom also declares that discerning people, those who have a godly perspective and character, can recognize truth and honesty.

People of high character who speak the truth and have a discerning spirit recognize purity and honesty in other people. They enjoy a sweetness of fellowship that the less honest, pure, and discerning cannot appreciate or understand. When people with pure hearts meet, there is a mutuality of openness and authenticity between them. There is no need to hide feelings, slant answers, or manipulate impressions. They express feelings and opinions with naturalness and transparency. They do not fret about what the other person will think because their goal is to be faithful and true to what they are expressing. They know lesser characters may take offense at the honesty and scurry away, but larger and grander souls will gravitate toward such faithful communication. A friendship formed between honest people will be deep, real, and faithful.

Such honesty is needed in all relationships, whether in business, church, politics, or friendship. Such honesty is essential in marriage. "An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips." Such honesty is a vital ingredient to the level of trust that is necessary for a husband and wife to walk together for fifty years. The sweetness of their kisses can only endure if it is in the context of the sweetness of transparency and trust. Listen to the advice of a marriage counselor:

"When honesty and cooperation exist in a marriage, you have a couple who is willing to share and to build together. They do not need to be secretive or private. Neither wishes to lie and shade the truth to protect the spouse. When you build your marriage on trust, you experience a joyful willingness to share all personal feelings with the one you have chosen for a life partner." (Willard F. Harley, Jr., His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage [Grand Rapids: Fleming H. Revell], p. 102)

Kissing may still be in a category by itself, but it must share attention with honesty. If you want your marriage to be a great one, give as much attention to the purity of your heart as to the sweetness of your affection.

Warren Baldwin

(From the book "Roaring Lions, Cracking Rocks and other Gems from Proverbs"

PARENTING: Two Extremes #7

PARENTING: Two Extremes #7

Wrap-Up

Thanks for bearing with me through this seven-part series on parenting. I have some other articles on parenting I'll be posting sometime, but I'll leave the subject of parenting for a little while.

I appreciate all of you who have read and shared your feedback. It was interesting and instructive! Your personal stories and input added greatly. Some of you have such insight and wisdom about this that I would encourage you to blog about some of your experiences. One of the prinicples of Proverbs is that the older people push wisdom and experience down so younger generations have access to it. Blogging is one avenue for that.

Initially I intended to discuss some attitudes related to parenting. Below is the list I compiled and hoped to discuss using verses and principles from Proverbs. This is as yet an unfinished project. Some of you may want to write something on this.

Principles of Parenting from Proverbs:
1) Balancing love and control
2) Using action instead of anger in disciplining
3) Disciplining with consistency, firmness and love
4) Patience
5) Kindness
6) Teach-Discipline
7) Family bonding (Prov. 4)
8) Teaching responsibility

If any of you would like this whole series in one article to print off or use in anyway, you can find it here.

Parenting is a fulltime call. Once we enter the process we never leave it. Even when our kids become adults, as two of my three have, we still parent. It takes a different form and approach, but we still function in the lives of our children as the older, more mature voice still nuturing, still guiding, still parenting. It strikes me that as we parent our children through the transitions of life, and as we go through those changes with them, we function in some way like God functions with us. That is a sobering thought.

God bless, and thanks again.

One more thing ... I want to thank RCUBES for the nice award below. This award is for promoting and recognizing friendship among bloggers. RCUBES is a nurse in a correctional institution and writes about her unique experiences in her work, and making spiritual points. You will enjoy her stories and lessons. Thank you RCUBES! You can read her blog here.

Warren

PARENTING: Two Extremes #6

PARENTING: Two Extremes #6

ROOTS AND WINGS

Ultimately, I think the goal of good parenting is to provide our kids with roots and wings. Roots are the orientation we give our children to the family values and ethics. Roots are the family traditions that we incorporate our children into, traditions of Thanksgiving and Christmas at grandma and grandpa’s, visits with the "Cookie Lady" (one of my great-grandmothers, who always brought cookies with her when she came to visit us), church, work and other important family activities that function generation after generation.

Roots are what give our children identity when they are away from us. When our son or daughter is in a new environment, and they are free to create the identity that they want with their new group of peers, roots are what direct them to uphold the values and traditions they were raised with. Even in a new environment, without any external constraint to behave a certain way, roots will direct them to be honest and moral. Roots will take them to worship, work, and back home for the holidays. Roots are the voice that whispers in their ear, "Remember who you are. Remember how you were raised. Live right, don’t break your parents’ heart."

We need to give our children roots, so that when they are raised and have left our home and formed their own, they will continue to pass on to their children the same values they received from us. But giving them roots is only part of what they need from us. We also need to give them the freedom to leave us. The freedom to leave us means they might experiment with a lifestyle we don’t approve of, or they may even leave our lifestyle altogether. But the freedom to leave us means they are also free to choose to live as they were raised. The freedom to leave means they have wings, and we give them those wings. The roots we have given them means they will always be oriented to the values of their upbringing, and the wings we give them means they are free to go off and use those wings to form their own lives and families.

After his prom, a high school graduate was invited with a group of his friends to another student’s house for a party. He’d never been to one of the groups "parties," and decided to go for a little while. This evening was a celebration of his graduation. His parents gave him permission to be out later than usual. He was about thirty miles from home. This new graduate had a lot of "freedom" to fly on his own that night.

At his friend’s house all the students gathered in one room, many of them sitting on the floor around the room. Soon, several guys began carrying in the coolers filled with beer. In just a moment he was the only one sitting there without a drink. "Come on, don’t you want one?" "No, I don’t think so. Not yet anyway." Several times he was invited to participate in the party rather than just watching it. Each time he said, "No thanks, not yet." Then, he suddenly stood up, thanked his friends for the invitation and said, "I really must be going," and before anyone could object to his departure, he promptly left the house.

The ride home took half an hour. All the way home he wondered what it would have been like to join in what looked like so much fun. "Would I have gotten drunk off only one or two beers? Would it really matter, just this once? Would it really kill my Christian witness? Would it permanently mar my ‘record’ of trying to make good choices?"

At the same time, the student was glad he didn’t compromise at that house. There was another time or two when he caved in and had a drink, but not this time. He said, "No," and he left when it kept getting harder to stand by his conviction to not drink.

His thirty-minute ride home that night was a long one. He was home by 11:30 on the night of his prom and banquet. Every one else in his family was already in bed asleep, and soon he was, too. The next day was, well, just another day. A day without regret, without worries, without any negative ramifications. But in another way, it was a day of victory.

He didn’t realize it at the time, but years later he realized that the roots his parents had given him kept him secure that night in his family values. At the same time, the wings his parents had given him that night to choose his own course were directed by his roots. The young man did make his choice that night, without his parents or anyone breathing down his neck. There was no authoritarian, "You better do what I say!" bearing down on him. There was no angry threatening from a parent that he better choose well! Instead, there was the confidence of the mother and father in this young man that their years of training and nurturing him would pay off. His parents trusted that when he took his flight that night, he would fly well. That thirty-minute drive was one of the most important of his life.

No child will choose well every time, either when they are but small children in our home or when they are older and venturing out on their own. But what we work and pray for is the proper direction. If their course is in the direction of heaven, their flight will go well.

Why Am I Different From Others?

Why Am I Different From Others?

Thanks to my friend John Schluter for sending this to me.

Warren

The Umpire

The Umpire

Last night a close baseball game between two first place contenders was almost decided by the umpire. Games should be determined by the players, not the refs or umps.

The batter took a swing at a ball which was fouled off. The next pitch was a strike. The next pitch was a strike. The next pitch was driven into right center for a two run single.

Wait a minute ... "the next pitch ...?" If the batter had three strikes, how could there be another pitch for him to hit?

The umpire failed to click "strike" on his hand-held counter when the foul ball was hit. He neglected to register it as a strike because he turned to follow the ball to make sure it didn’t enter fair territory. So, he allowed to more strikes on the batter, and instead of calling him "out," he allowed him to drive in two runs.

After the hit the catcher turned to the ump and said, "He already had three strikes, you should have called him out." Then the other coach asked, "Didn’t he already have three strikes?"

Have you ever seen those commercials where somebody makes a big blunder in front of other people, and then a voice says, "Need to get away?" I know that is how this umpire felt last night.

I was that umpire.

That was not the last bad call I made last night, but it was the worst one! It almost determined the outcome of the game.

As much as I remember that sinking feeling after realizing my mistake, something else sticks out even more. The catcher, the 12 year-old boy who was the first to catch my mistake, never said another thing about it. He dropped it and went on with the game. The coach of the team the call went against did the same thing as his catcher: he asked about the call, calmly let me know he disagreed, then dropped it. He may have been more upset than he let on, but his character won out over his emotions and he stayed calm and collected. He set a good example of self-control in front of his players. You could see that reflected in his catcher.

When you coach youth sports, there really is something more important than winning the game. There is the matter of character, of impressing young boys and girls with the importance of conducting themselves with dignity and honor, even when calls, and games, go against you.

This coach eventually won the game, but he won something even more important. He won the respect of people who watched the game. And he earned the right to be respected by his players as a role model worth emulating.

Thanks coach.

Warren Baldwin

Note: If you like sports stories, remember to check out Sports Inspiration.

PARENTING: Two Extremes #5

PARENTING: Two Extremes #5

BALANCING THE EXTREMES

The two extreme styles of parenting moms and dad can gravitate toward are permissiveness and over-control. Neither extreme is helpful to the children. A better approach to navigating these extremes is to find a balance between them. James Dobson says, "Healthy parenting can be boiled down to these two essential ingredients: love and control ... Any concentration on love to the exclusion of control usually breeds disrespect and contempt. Conversely, an authoritarian and oppressive home atmosphere is deeply resented by the child who feels unloved or even hatred." [James Dobson, The New Strong-Willed Child (Wheaton, IL: Tyndale, 2004), p.103.]

Neither permissiveness, which is sometimes misconstrued as love, nor authoritarianism, which is sometimes misconstrued as legitimate parental oversight, are healthy for a family. Neither extreme fosters respect for the leadership role of the mother and father. The leadership role is one of authority, not to be confused with authoritarianism. Authority means you are in control, yet respect the rights and dignity of those you lead. Authoritarianism means you rule with an iron-fist, and do not respect the rights and dignity of those you lead. An authoritarian spirit crushes those it rules over. This may be something of the spirit Paul warned against in Colossians 3:21 when he wrote, "Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged."

You might think also of an umpire in a baseball game. He is in charge of the game. He makes decisions that you can argue, to a point, but not change. The umpire alone has the authority to change his mind about a call and alter it. An umpire may call a runner out, and even though everyone else saw the play differently, the umpire’s call is the one that stands. You can argue with him as vehemently as you choose, but when the argument is over, the umpire will still be in the game while you may be removed from it!

How does an umpire establish his authority? From the very beginning the umpire’s authority is established by his equipment: he wears a uniform that sets him apart from everyone else, he has protective gear, such as a face mask, a brush for the plate and a counter to record statistics by each inning. An umpire’s authority is further established by his demeanor on the field. He does not have to walk out onto the field barking orders. He can walk out straight and confident, and everyone picks up on the fact that this man is in charge of the game.

I have seen umpires behave beneath the dignity of their position. I’ve seen umpires lose control, erupt in anger and get in arguments with fans and yell at coaches, "Shut your mouth!" Such umpires are trying to impose an authoritarian flavor on their role, but they are not winning the respect or confidence of the players, coaches or fans.

What are ways that parents, like umpires, establish their authority in the home?
What are ways that parents, again like umpires, might undermine their own authority by becoming authoritarian?

Warren Baldwin

PARENTING: Two Extremes #4

Parenting: Two Extremes #4

There are parents who have seen the liberal approach to parenting and have recoiled from it. They have seen the disrespect and disobedience in engenders in children and they don’t want to raise their own that way. So, they run to the opposite extreme, and in the attempt to avoid permissiveness they can become too authoritarian. Their approach is to so dominate their children that they will not have bad desires or behavior. They will not rebel because they won’t be allowed to! They deny them any opportunity to make decisions and explore their little domains.

This approach works for a while, but it too has its pitfalls. For one, people will submit to that level of control for only so long. When children are little they must be thoroughly controlled for their own safety and health. But as they get older they want to question, examine and explore. Under the watchful eye of concerned parents they can pursue their curiosity in safety and within limits. As they grow older and more mature, the limits on their behavior can be expanded to allow even more freedom, still under the control of the parents.

But if a child is denied any liberty to question and make decisions on his or her own, he or she will eventually rebel against that. It may not happen until they are eighteen and leave home. At that point they have total freedom to choose! And often times they make very destructive decisions. Even though they may never have engaged in destructive behavior while they were younger, they did not abstain because they were taught to or were mentored to develop character or the ability to show restraint. In an authoritarian home they simply were not allowed to participate in destructive behavior. But, they likely were not given the insight into why they should not participate and were not given the discipline to refuse participation. So, went they got out on their own they were not prepared for the freedom and they abused it.

What are some simple ways we can begin allowing children to make decisions on their own at the various stages of growth and development?

How do we build respect and self-discipline in them so that when they are away from us they will behave as instructed at home?

Warren Baldwin

Premios Dardo Award

Premios Dardo Award

I want to thank Ana V. at The Writer Today for sharing the "Premios Dardo" (Top Dart) award with me. Ana's site says, "This award acknowledges the values that every blogger shows in his or her effort to transmit cultural, ethical, literary, and personal values everyday. "

Ana's blog is about writing, and is one of several I read about writing because I get good ideas. For example, here is a recent post of hers about why we get writers block and how to overcome it. I encourage you

to click over there and read that helpful article.

Thank you Ana.

Warren
Note: I just posted an article "An Encouraging Word" on my site for Bible studies/articles on Bible Fountain.

Parenting: Two Extremes #3

Parenting: Two Extremes #3

Hello! It has been several days since I have posted. Thank you for all who have left comments on the first two articles in this little series on parenting extremes. I’ve been away from the computer and I’ve been busy on other things. I will make post replies in the comment section of part 2 to those of you who commented.

One thing I did was go with my family to the college softball world series in Edmond, OK. If you live anywhere near Oklahoma City you ought to go next year!! Besides some exciting competition, there is a pretty neat family-atmosphere, with games and activities for children outside the stadium. (The same is true of the college baseball world series in Omaha, NE).

At one point in our trip we switched vehicles and I left my camera/recorder in my car. I was sorry later! We sat behind the Alabama dugout when Alabama won 14-0. The energy was electrifying! The third baseman led her team in a chant with the Alabama fans responding. That would have made a great post. Anyway, next year!

Now ... some comments on Part 2 ...

You all made wonderful comments! Some shared similar experiences of car wrecks, of having to work to replace a vehicle, of have rules about driving responsibly, etc. Some had excellent suggestions about what to do if something like this happens again.

I want to point out that I do not think this boy was particularly evil in any way. I think he was a boy, in a car and in a hurry. He no more intended to kill that old gentleman than I did. None-the-less, his careless behavior did kill someone.

I don’t think this in itself indicated poor parenting, either. I know that the times I drove too fast as a teen, one time on a wet road that almost saw me wreck, would NOT have had the approval of my parents. It was me. No one blames the parents for the wreck.

My concern is how to minister to, encourage, and mature the boy after the fact. Buying him a new car so he doesn’t feel so bad doesn’t seem like a good solution. What can you buy the widow, children, and grandchildren of the man who was killed so that they don’t feel so bad?

Someone mentioned that the pain of guilt is a good thing. It is even a godly thing. “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret ...” (2 Cor. 7:10). Before he can truly recover, establish himself in life, and live in a healthy way, I think the young man needs to feel whatever pain comes from his behavior. He doesn’t need to feel it alone: that is what family, church, mentors, friends and even counselors are for, to help us bear the unbearable. But feel that pain we must. Numbed pain is still pain, and it will find other destructive outlets.

Secondly, I agree with those who suggested he work to buy his next car. I’ve read a number of articles that say teens who buy their own cars have less accidents than teens who are given a car. Our policy was that our kids will buy their own cars, even the first one. Also, they are not allowed to borrow to buy the car, they must pay cash for it. That way they learn the responsibility of working, saving and car ownership and they avoid the first big debt-trap many people fall into.

I haven’t heard from this young man in a long time, but I know where his home is and I will be there later this year. Writing this has spurred a curiosity to find out how he is doing.

Being the father of two young adult drivers and one teen driver, I live with the fear of the parents of the boy in this story. What would I do if my child was the driver? Until actually there I can’t know for sure. But, whatever it is, I hope it is redemptive to the family that is grieving a loss as well as to the child I want to save.

Thank you for your participation in this series! I am honored that you will visit here, read, and even comment.

As an end to a rather tough discussion, I invite you to listen to a song my two daughters recently introduced me to.

One more thing ... my son Wes has just started a new blog he would like to invite you to. It is called Sports Inspiration.

God bless,
Warren